FEARLESS FRIDAY
Please welcome Alice Loweecey to Fearless Friday with an intriguing post!
Apparently, I’m an overachiever,
because I’ve accomplished two life-changing events. Yay, me?
Back in the day, Catholic schools
were staffed almost entirely by nuns. The old way (sort of): Nuns in modified
habits looking like cosplaying penguins. (I really like penguins, too.)
The nuns were so mysterious and set
apart. Could you imagine being one of those special women? What a carrot to
dangle in front of teenage girls’ noses.
I snatched the carrot and learned
first-hand how a cult operates.
Cut you off from family and friends?
Check.
Change the way you dress? Check.
Change the way you walk and talk?
Check. (Really.)
Censor your reading material? Check.
(Although the reeducation sort of makes you censor it yourself.)
Open your mail and listen in on your
phone calls? Check.
Read your private journal?
Check.
I took it for years because I was
“chosen,” “special,” “set apart.” Brainwashing gets its hooks into you and you
have to work for a long time to dislodge them. I blame no one but myself for
the brainwashing. I could’ve walked away anytime pre-convent. But, yanno,
“chosen,” “special,” “set apart.”
Four years in, I made the decision
to jump the wall. There was a wall, but I walked out the door. Less drama,
easier on the ankles. By the way, if you ever hear the phrase “jump the wall,”
it means only one thing: Leaving the convent.
So much for life-changer #1.
You may think entering the convent
is difficult. You’re right. Leaving behind everyone and everything, changing
practically everything about yourself, living with 95 women who all cycle at
the same time. But let me assure you, it’s a tropical vacation compared to
walking away from it all.
I spent my last two weeks as a nun
in my room. I came out of it only for meals and Mass.
30+ years ago, there was something
of an exodus of younger nuns. The older nuns watched and thought, “Who’s
going to push my wheelchair when I get old?”
Fifteen years passed before I got
past the anger of those last few months in the convent. Now I look back and
realize the nuns were scared and took out their fear on me.
Less than fun.
I came home to my parents’ house
with a single change of clothes to my name. Not like I was going to sneak a
habit in my bag. If YouTube had been around then, the clip of me trying on high
heels for the first time in four years would’ve gone viral in a day.
The weirdest part? Interacting with people
as an equal instead of a combination RCC ad/Dear Abby/authority figure.
Just like when I joined the Cult of
the Convent and changed everything about myself, I had to relearn who I was as
a “regular” person.
Life changer #2 achieved.
But when life hands you horrible
experiences—use them for fiction! That’s my philosophy. Also, I have party
conversation for the rest of my life. And nun jokes. A lot of nun jokes. If you
ever see me at a writers’ conference, I’ll tell you a few.
--
Doomsday Preppers and Online Dating
and Cults, oh my! Nun but the Brave, Giulia Driscoll's
new mystery, is in stores now from Henery Press.
The Redeemers are here!
Haunt your nightmares now, from Dark Recesses Press.
Baker of brownies and tormenter of characters, Alice Loweecey recently celebrated her thirtieth year outside the convent. She grew up watching Hammer horror films and Scooby-Doo mysteries, which explains a whole lot. When she's not creating trouble for her sleuth Giulia Driscoll or inspiring nightmares as her alter-ego Kate Morgan, she can be found growing her own vegetables (in summer) and cooking with them (the rest of the year).
As a lifelong protestant, I've always been fascinated by certain things about the Catholic church--nuns being at the top of the list. Your experience makes me sad because part of me still wants to think being a nun is like it was in Bells of St. Mary. :-(
ReplyDeleteLiz, I felt the same way. You never know until you live it.
DeleteThanks for replying. It's entirely possible some convents--the few that are left--still mimic movies like The Bells of St. Mary's. That wasn't my experience, alas. But at least I'm getting some good fiction out of it. :)
ReplyDeleteWhat an experience to have gone through so young! But I love the books that came out of it!
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping in Ovidia.
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